my watch

Let me start this post by stating outright that time has never been my friend. Perhaps I don't respect it enough, don't realize it's value, or just find almost everything else more important, or perhaps it just isn't on my side. I call wearing watches being "shackled to time," handcuffed to it's whims and bound to it's measurement of life. I've been criticized since kindergarten for being late, late, late! Detentions, demerits, lectures on the value of time and the disrespect shown to others when I am late, fights with friends, docked grades- all have, in 27 years, failed to teach me to respect time.

I should take a moment to state that I am, surprisingly and ridiculously and for the most part reliably on time for jobs and classes. Duly noted.

SO. One of the first things I did when I decided to do a triathlon, is buy a watch- a stopwatch, even. I know! And I even wore it every day. I know!

Have I been more on time since wearing a stopwatch every day? nah. In fact, I use it mostly to time how long public transportation or cabs take, or walking, or I time people walking by, or the I time the seconds between waves... I really like the stopwatch feature. It can turn almost anything into a game.

Of course it is also my lifeline during difficult runs, bikes, and swims. It told me exactly how much longer I needed to keep going, how much I had improved, and how much further I had to my goals. Many times in the cold of winter with 20 mph icy headwinds I would roll up my sleeve and desperately will my watch to tell me I was almost done with the run. If there was a camera on it, it would show my face in despair and pain during a difficult workout, in joy as I completed a lap faster than the one before, and in freeing bliss in the middle of a wild bike ride along the lake.

My watch became a constant friend on my wrist- a loyal witness to all my ups and downs. And, I took it off for the past three weeks. It's absence has been palpable, like a missing limb, and time has just flowed by, my body given a break from time to fight the virus, hours, days, weeks, blending into one.

Tomorrow, however, I will wear the watch again. The break is over; it is time to start training again. Tomorrow I start over.