heavy

heavy like a thousand oak trees, standing firm on the earth
heavy like an anchor tied to my feet, drop me in deep water
heavy like thoughts that swirl and cloud and muffle
heavy like rationale that destroys faith, knowledge that steals joy,
heavy like the burden of all that is yet to be done, all the time still to live
heavy like a hard relationship, a hard situation, a hard choice
heavy like having to let go
heavy like being vulnerable
bleeding out vulnerable
heavy like my heart.