double time now

 

the seasons at this time of the year go from summer to winter very quickly- 80 degrees in the morning, 30 at night in one day, and then here we are, in the 40s, 50s, light jackets, gloves, scarves.

I find myself putting on socks more often.

this quick change of seasons is also reflected in my life. after months of waiting, years, things are moving, moving quickly now, double time. gasp to catch up and relax in the momentum, letting it carry me to the end of the year. I took on another full time job, working after my full time job medical sculpting, 5 mins down the road to a Christmas ornament shop, personalizing ornaments until 10pm. and then again for 10 hours on Saturday. for 6 weeks. rock climbing classes on Friday. Still the long commute. But if i hustle now, Jan 1st, when I START FREELANCING (oh happy day!) I will be in much better financial shape. And freelancing, working from home, oh what joy that gives my heart to not have to sit in a car for so long, wasting so much of my life. this year has been absolutely horrendous in that regard, absolutely. I will probably even get a rid of my car end of January, as I have not enjoyed it very much. I prefer biking, really. there's nothing like exerting yourself to get to a place. and that constant exercise... nothing better for my whole being.

amidst the hustle, if there is a silence, a moment to myself, it takes only a thought and i am crying wholly for my grandma. I do not like the thought of Christmas and Thanksgiving without her, I do not like it one bit.

 double time now, gotta hustle.